The Hunt

Many leaders pride themselves on being supportive and empowering their teams. They’re problem-solvers, always ready to lend a hand and guide employees toward success. But what happens when our help-aholic tendencies hinders growth? What if our eagerness to assist actually hinders growth, stifles innovation, and breeds resentment?

Let’s talk about “Help-aholism” and being a “Help-aholic” – the often well-intentioned but ultimately detrimental habit of overhelping. Just like over-parenting or over-caring in our personal lives, overhelping in a professional context can have serious consequences.

The Perils of “Help-aholism” in the Workplace

Think about it. As managers, our role isn’t to do the work for our team, but to empower them to do it themselves. When we jump in too quickly, provide all the answers, or constantly look over their shoulders, we’re essentially saying, “I don’t think you can handle this on your own.” This can manifest in several damaging ways:

• Stifled Creativity and Innovation: When managers control the process and outcome too tightly, they create an environment where employees are less likely to take risks, experiment with new ideas, or think outside the box. This stifles developing their own problem-solving skills.
• Erosion of Trust and Autonomy: Overhelping sends a clear message of distrust. It suggests that you don’t believe in your team’s capabilities. This can lead to disengagement, decreased motivation, and a feeling of being micromanaged. Employees may become hesitant to take ownership. The National Library of Medicine has done extensive research on the effects of micromanaging.
• Dependency and Learned Helplessness: When managers consistently solve problems for their team members, those individuals may become reliant on this support and less capable of tackling challenges independently. This creates a cycle of dependence and inadvertently teaches employees to rely on the manager instead of themselves.
• Burnout for the “Help-aholic” Manager: Constantly intervening and taking on tasks that could be handled by others can lead to significant stress and burnout for the manager. They become overloaded, potentially neglecting their own core responsibilities and strategic thinking.
• Blurring of Roles and Responsibilities: When managers frequently step in to do tasks outside their purview, it can blur the lines of who is responsible for what. This can lead to confusion, duplicated efforts, and a lack of accountability within the team.

Why We Become “Help-aholics”

The urge to overhelp often stems from good intentions. In our personal lives, it might be rooted in:

• A desire to nurture and protect: As parents or caregivers, our instinct is often to shield loved ones from difficulty.
• A need to feel needed: Helping others can provide a sense of purpose and validation.
• Impatience or a desire for quick results: Sometimes it feels faster and easier to just do it ourselves.
• Habitual patterns: We may have learned these behaviors over time.

In a professional context, “Help-aholism” can be driven by:

• A strong sense of responsibility: Managers feel accountable for their team’s success and may believe they need to be involved in every detail.
• Perfectionism and a fear of mistakes: Wanting to ensure a flawless outcome can lead to excessive intervention.
• Difficulty delegating: A belief that “it’s better to do it myself” can prevent managers from empowering their team.
• A desire to be seen as helpful and knowledgeable: Overhelping can sometimes be a way to assert authority or demonstrate expertise.

Interestingly, some research suggests that “overhelping” may be interpreted as a lack of trust and can even be a subtle tactic to undermine someone’s perceived competence.

Breaking Free from being a “Help-aholic”

Recognizing you’re a “Help-aholic” is the first step toward healthier management practices. Here are some strategies to stop overhelping:

• Self-Reflection: Regularly ask yourself:
  • Am I jumping in too quickly to solve problems for my team?
  • Am I providing solutions before allowing my team to explore their own?
  • Do I often feel like I’m doing more of the “doing” than my team?
  • Do my team members seem hesitant to take initiative?
• Practice Asking Questions: Instead of immediately offering solutions, ask your team members questions that encourage critical thinking and problem-solving. For example, “What have you tried so far?” or “What are your initial thoughts on how to approach this?”
• Delegate Effectively: Clearly define tasks and expected outcomes, and then trust your team to execute them. Provide the necessary resources and support, but step back and allow them to take ownership.
• Resist the Urge to Intervene Immediately: When a team member encounters a challenge, your first instinct might be to jump in. Instead, give them space to work through it. Offer guidance if they explicitly ask for it, but focus on coaching rather than doing it for them.
• Focus on Empowerment and Development: Shift your focus from fixing problems to developing your team’s skills and abilities. Provide opportunities for learning, growth, and independent problem-solving.
• Set Clear Boundaries: Just as in personal relationships, establish clear boundaries about the level and type of help you will provide. Communicate these boundaries to your team.
• Encourage Peer Support: Foster a team environment where members can support each other and learn from one another, reducing their reliance on you as the sole problem-solver.
• Provide Feedback, Not Just Solutions: When reviewing work or addressing challenges, focus on providing constructive feedback that helps your team learn and improve, rather than simply correcting their mistakes.
• Recognize and Celebrate Independent Successes: Acknowledge and celebrate when your team members successfully tackle challenges on their own. This reinforces their capabilities and encourages future independence.

Identifying “Help-aholics” in Your Organization

Organizations can also take steps to identify and address patterns of overhelping:

• Observe Team Dynamics: Look for teams where the manager seems overly involved in the day-to-day tasks or where team members consistently defer to the manager for every decision.
• Gather Employee Feedback: Anonymous surveys or 360-degree feedback can provide valuable insights into employees’ perceptions of their managers’ support styles.
• Monitor Project Outcomes: If projects are frequently delayed due to manager intervention or if team members seem unable to progress without constant direction, it could be a sign of overhelping.
• Promote Leadership Training: Training programs can educate managers on the importance of empowerment, delegation, and fostering autonomy within their teams.

As the premier executive staffing firm that supports the SaaS, B2B Tech & B2B Services industries, the recruiters at Artemis Consultants are mindful of the “Help-aholic Trap”. By recognizing this tendency in ourselves and our organizations, and by consciously shifting towards empowerment and trust, we can cultivate teams that are creative, resilient, and ultimately more successful. Let’s move from being the constant problem-solver to the empowering guide, fostering a culture where our teams can truly thrive on their own.